Yipee, its Monday again! Another day of brutal honesty and living to tell about it! This free therapy is brought to you by MckMama. Click over to her blog to see hundred’s of other’s confessions!
I did NOT laugh silently and nearly uncontrollably in the living room as all three boys tried on (of their own volition) the unmentionable baseball equipment we purchased for them last Sunday in the boy’s bedroom. They were not horrified at how the equipment felt on them. I did not hear it described as “humiliating” in the midst of their giggles. They did not each show me said equipment in spite of the humiliation!
Holden (who we do NOT frequently say was aptly named because he’s always “holdin’ IT”—wink, wink, if you know what I mean), did NOT declare the baseball equipment, “Good, because it keeps me from holdin’ it!”
My friend Kim did not drop her husband’s birthday cake on the floor just before cutting and serving it (but after singing and candles and pictures with the cake). She did not almost immediately insist that this not be mentioned on my blog. She is not thinking about doing her own “Not me!” post for the first time! She wouldn’t have any FABULOUS material to start with or anything! I was not so sad that I didn't have my camera for a picture of her upside down cake!
I did not throw a complete temper tantrum one day last week when I was upset about the kitchen being messed up, chores not being done, dishes getting broken, and water bottles not coming home from school. I did not stomp my feet, yell, throw things and ask the same questions over and over again…and I wonder where toddlers learn this stuff…Not from me!
I did not take pictures of the men working to get the school bus to start while we were on a field trip and needing to get back home. I was not so grateful that the battery was located just outside my window affording me the perfect shot.
I did NOT laugh silently and nearly uncontrollably in the living room as all three boys tried on (of their own volition) the unmentionable baseball equipment we purchased for them last Sunday in the boy’s bedroom. They were not horrified at how the equipment felt on them. I did not hear it described as “humiliating” in the midst of their giggles. They did not each show me said equipment in spite of the humiliation!
Holden (who we do NOT frequently say was aptly named because he’s always “holdin’ IT”—wink, wink, if you know what I mean), did NOT declare the baseball equipment, “Good, because it keeps me from holdin’ it!”
My friend Kim did not drop her husband’s birthday cake on the floor just before cutting and serving it (but after singing and candles and pictures with the cake). She did not almost immediately insist that this not be mentioned on my blog. She is not thinking about doing her own “Not me!” post for the first time! She wouldn’t have any FABULOUS material to start with or anything! I was not so sad that I didn't have my camera for a picture of her upside down cake!
I did not throw a complete temper tantrum one day last week when I was upset about the kitchen being messed up, chores not being done, dishes getting broken, and water bottles not coming home from school. I did not stomp my feet, yell, throw things and ask the same questions over and over again…and I wonder where toddlers learn this stuff…Not from me!
I did not take pictures of the men working to get the school bus to start while we were on a field trip and needing to get back home. I was not so grateful that the battery was located just outside my window affording me the perfect shot.
I did not stand up to get a better angle of the hood up. I did not take just a little heat for taking these pictures, and I did not explain the perfectly logical need for such pictures, as, “Hey, this is blogworthy!” No, I wouldn’t do anything like that! 
When we left the school for the field trip, I did not leave my daughter’s lunch in the van after being so careful to grab my own. I did not have to then share my lunch with her and was not secretly glad she turned her nose up to my sandwich just because it had mustard on it. Not me! I am much more concerned about my child’s nutrition than my empty stomach!
I did not insert this picture into this post just because its so cute of Holden's entire class:
My son did not scold me after looking through the pictures I took of us on the field trip by saying, “The sign said you were not supposed to touch the flowers, Mom!!” He was not mortified that I had broken the rules! I did not justify my behavior by telling him, “I didn’t see the sign!”…oh boy, I am sure that one will bite me in the bum someday soon! See, he followed the rules:
And ummm...yeah:
My computer does not keep getting infected with the same viruses, like 700 times a day. I can eliminate them for a few minutes, but I keep getting them back again. I am not currently suspicious of Facebook…anyone else…ideas???
Last night, I did not have a dream in which I was looking for my scrub pants and was wandering around outside in my top and underwear trying also to find my laundry room. In my dream, I did not think, “Oh, this is a good Not Me! moment!” as cars driving by were honking at me. I have not let this Not Me! Monday post invade even my dreams!!
I did not joke around last night as I feasted on Superbowl food that I would have to fast today to make up for the calorie surge last night. I will not actually be fasting because I think I picked up my son’s stomach bug :o(
Whatare you NOT up to?
My son did not scold me after looking through the pictures I took of us on the field trip by saying, “The sign said you were not supposed to touch the flowers, Mom!!” He was not mortified that I had broken the rules! I did not justify my behavior by telling him, “I didn’t see the sign!”…oh boy, I am sure that one will bite me in the bum someday soon! See, he followed the rules:
And ummm...yeah:
My computer does not keep getting infected with the same viruses, like 700 times a day. I can eliminate them for a few minutes, but I keep getting them back again. I am not currently suspicious of Facebook…anyone else…ideas???Last night, I did not have a dream in which I was looking for my scrub pants and was wandering around outside in my top and underwear trying also to find my laundry room. In my dream, I did not think, “Oh, this is a good Not Me! moment!” as cars driving by were honking at me. I have not let this Not Me! Monday post invade even my dreams!!
I did not joke around last night as I feasted on Superbowl food that I would have to fast today to make up for the calorie surge last night. I will not actually be fasting because I think I picked up my son’s stomach bug :o(
Whatare you NOT up to?
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1 comment:
I am NOT laughing until I am coughing uncontrollably at the mental picture of the boys parading in the unmentionable baseball equipment. I did NOT find it hilarious that this may be the answer to Hold-en it's problem. I am not also sad that I am not there to enjoy Alayna days with you. I am NOT looking forward to moving there at all!!
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